Game of Thrones, Russian Edition.
The Ukrainians have been dethroned.
Removed from the seat of power.
Ukrainian navy unseated.
Russians obviously do not give a crap.
Russians win all seats in Ukrainian election.
The commodore without a commode
Disproving that the Ukrainians don't do squat
Gender-nonexistent washrooms installed in all Ukrainian vessels
Non-Earth-Species-Specific restrooms in forward-thinking Ukrainian naval vessels
Nice ships but the view is crappy, say Ukrainian naval gazers
Besting, by far, British finishing school and university boys, Russians sieze anything that could possibly be a quirky mascot of the Ukrainian naval fleet
Russians return Ukrainian ships, but were obviously intrigued by the unique chairs that seemed curiously overbuilt. Could they be interdimensional travel portals?
Inter-ship communication wireless telephone stations examined by Russian navy; Ukrainians confused, stating "How then, shall we talk to 'Ralph?'"
Russians, wearying of American political media, make it physically impossible to file Any "Ralph Reports."
In a move reminiscent of Soviet-Era central Stalinist planning, Russian naval officer commands toilets removed to combat seasickness by removing "incentive to vomit."
70 percent reduction in "selfies" taken by women in the Russian navy during tour. Instagram baffled.